67. Do You Relax More Often?
Just coping, getting ahead of yourself; it’s very human. We busy bees! Taking on more than we can handle. Biting off more than you can chew. Sitting down and relax is for the lazy people, you cannot allow yourself to do that. There is still so much work to be done! No break for me! Laziness is unacceptable. Lounging is not for me!
Do you feel that you always have to be doing something useful?
Always busy? Sit down, no time for it! And if you finally sit down for just a minute, you get up again after 2 minutes. No rest in your body. It creates a hectic life with the conviction that it’s good that you are doing so much work. Golly gee, I sure did a lot today and then you fall totally exhausted in bed. On the way to the next over-filled day.
On your way to a burnout?
If you can’t manage to get yourself out of this circus, you keep on going until you are completely exhausted and have created a burnout. You wait until you have an alibi to be able to rest. I lived like this for decades. When I developed the MIR-Method, I was deeply tired. I couldn’t go on. But relax? No way. Just kept going on. I developed a persistent, stubborn cough. It stayed until I developed pneumonia. When our family physician told me that I really needed to take antibiotics and I got the prescription, a big weight fell off of me. I came home, waved the prescription and said, almost cheerfully: “I’ve got pneumonia!” and went to bed. For six entire weeks. And I loved all that peace and quiet! Later, I realized that I had created this situation myself and I saw how much I had depended on my husband all that time. And how this wouldn’t have been necessary if I had just enjoyed being “idle”, my laziness, in time.
Is it bad to be lazy or to relax?
Laziness is nothing other than rest. Taking a moment for yourself. Taking time to relax. Being still in order to receive new inspiration. What do you think women do while doing handicrafts? They are gathering their energy to regroup themselves again. What do people do while reading a book? They are totally inspired and feeding their energy. And what do you do when you sit on the sofa and stare? You’re taking good care of yourself. You are organizing your thoughts, keeping the outside world outside. You let your body rest and while doing so, your senses as well! Your eyes, your ears and your voice rest. This isn’t laziness; this is refueling, finding yourself, keeping yourself healthy!
What is it with “lazy” people?
I don’t believe people are lazy. In my opinion, they don’t exist. I know people who are not active. Who sit on the sofa a lot, don’t take any steps in their lives, and use their time doing things that don’t bring them any further: watching TV, playing endless pointless video games, but I don’t see that as laziness. These people have forgotten how worthwhile they are and have therefore forgotten their mission in life.
What happens to your hectic life when you do the MIR-Method?
For people who can’t seem to get off the merry-go-round, the MIR-Method slowly but surely gives them the signal to slow down. Usually you feel more tiredness during the first weeks. Just as long as it takes for you to realize that you need some rest and relax.
One of the steps that helps you with this is step 3: “Detach father. Detach mother”. What example did your parents give you? Were they hard workers who never sat still? Did they give you something to do just when you had opened a book? And what did they say to you? Did they say anything to you when you were relaxing? Most parents had to work hard for daily survival, providing for a family. Their example influenced you. By doing step 3, you detach yourself from your parents’ influence. You become more respectful of what you need and accept that it is necessary to take breaks. Slowly but surely inner peace is freed up. And if that means staring out a window, drawing a picture with your toddler, or crouching next to a ladybird, then be it so.
And, what about you? Are you relaxing more? In what way? Please tell me about it below! Thank you!
My wish for you is that you lead a nice active life, alternated with wonderful breaks and relaxing moments!
Hearty greetings,
Mireille Mettes
P.S. Will you help spread the MIR-Method? You would do me a big favor by forwarding this article to other people! Feel free to post it to your Facebook page or send it via e-mail, Twitter or Linked-In! Use the icons on the left-hand side or below! Thank you!
P.S. Not familiar with the MIR-Method yet? Please go to the homepage. You can watch the video there and also the instruction video. Sign up for our newsletter and 6 weeks of coaching e-mails for extra support!
Dear Mireille, I started using the Mir method a few months ago. However when ever I used the entire 10 statements
I feel physically and emotionally sick. So I only do the two statements. I tried to contact your coaches . Called and left a message abd emailed with no response. Their website is in Dutch and I can’t understand how to connect with them. I really appreciate your feedback and response. Thank you
Dear Forooz,
The coaches you need to look for are here on the website: Coaching Did you have a look there?
Greetings, Mireille
Hi Mireille, I found the MIR method by accident 3 days ago and started the same evening. I tend to be busy all the time and take on more work than I am usually able to finish. I have been working very hard at teaching an incredibly draining creative/practical online course for 8 weeks to First Year university students and also have many friends in crisis who have relied on my emotional support recently.
Today I could not stay out of bed. Within 2 hours of getting up I was too exhausted to function. I have spent most of the day sleeping in snippets but feel so guilty all the time. My body is sore, and I feel totally weak and unmotivated at present. I am as weak as a kitten and sincerely hope that it is the MIR method, else I am experiencing a depressive state that is totally new and very frightening to me. Not sure how to cope with this and would appreciate some reassurance/guidance. Zelda
Dear Zelda,
It is possible to find some old emotions surface, which can cause depression. Please make sure you let the emotions out, by crying, writing or telling somebody. Also taking extra sea salt will help, in case your body is lacking too many minerals.
If the depression is too strong or takes too long, please consult a MIR-Method coach.
Good luck!
Greetings, Mireille
I took the day off today and spent 8 hours in a city some distance away and treated myself to discovery and delight. It restored my soul and aliveness
Hi Mireille
Yes I do relax more often since doing the MIR method (and a few other things) and I don’t feel guilty. This week I even took a whole week off work, just because I can. To be honest though it took me a few days to get in the “relax mode” and let go the thought of “needing to get things done” around the house. Life is busy but we need to take a step back and enjoy it. I am having a healthy life/work balance again, thanks to the MIR-Method and others.
Dear Maria,
Sounds wonderful! Yes, it takes courage to really let go of the ‘obligation’ to do things. It is a great challenge for most people to really inhale life and ‘do nothing’, although those moments actually charge your ‘body’s battery’. Listening to birds whistle, listening to the silence, taking a lazy stroll, lying on the couch, staring at the walls. All wonderful to have a ‘relax moment’. Actually a real good thing for people who are highly sensitive!
Wishing you further good luck and a sparkling & relaxing life!
Hope to hear from you again!
Mireille